The official 2015 ASN Driver Rankings have been updated to reflect the 2015 Austrian Grand Prix – which we are calling the We’re-Not-German Grand Prix [due to the fact that Austrians don’t like to be linked to those smelly Germans who can’t even hold their own Grand Prix]. The Austrian Grand Prix is held on the Red Bull Ring which you would think would give the Red Bull-associated cars an advantage – but it doesn’t.
Once again, as usual, the pair of Mercedes in the front row took off from everybody else – with Nico Rosberg getting the best start and gradually pulling away from defending champion Lewis Hamilton until Lap 37 when Hamilton incurred a five-second penalty for crossing the pit lane exit – essentially taking him out of contention for the race win. The penalty might have even cost him a second-place finish had not third-place Sebastian Vettel lost more than 13 seconds in his pit stop when a rear tire wheel gun jammed. Vettel’s pit lane problem kept Hamilton in second and dropped Vettel to fourth – allowing Felipe Massa of Williams to barely keep ahead of Vettel for the final podium position.
As has become the routine in Formula One races this season, there were 20 cars starting but only 16 really racing as the Manor/Marussia cars are essentially speed bumps and the McLarens can’t seem to last more than 10 laps – so finishing in the top 10 is hardly an accomplishment – and with Mercedes’ domination, staying on the same lap as the leaders has become the newest “achievement” for every race. This week, only six cars were able to stay on the lead lap for the We’re-Not-German Grand Prix.
For the awards, it was another rarity as we got two races in a row where Lotus’ Pastor Maldonado was clear thinking for the entire race. Of course he couldn’t manage to stay on the lead lap, but he didn’t pummel anybody like Ferrari’s Kimi Raikkonen did to McLaren’s Fernando Alonso on the first lap. Raikkonen’s car is partially to blame in the incident but he still claims the coveted Pastor Maldonado Driving School Award for the race. Maldonado and his Lotus teammate Romain Grosjean still hold the season lead.
Radio transmissions were predictable – mirroring the race itself – but Hamilton’s temper tantrum after being assessed a penalty that was entirely his fault easily gets him the Kimi Raikkonen “Leave Me Alone, I Know What I’m Doing!” Award. Hamilton holds a commanding season lead for this award.
Former F1 racer Gerhard Berger was the obvious choice here for his various malaprops after the race, but since he’s not an active participant in anything F1 this season, we have to go with Top F1 Crusty Barnacle Bernie Ecclestone the winner of the Lewis Hamilton Doofus Moment Award for the 2015 We’re-Not-German Grand Prix – for his comments BEFORE the race occurred in which he blamed engineers for giving him a “crap product to sell” after they approved the hybrid power units and then saying the races were boring because “when Hamilton [starts] a race, we already know he will win by 20 seconds”. With these comments, Ecclestone now claims second place all by himself behind Hamilton in his signature award category.
The 2015 Formula One season continues with the British Grand Prix at Silverstone at 5 a.m. [PDT] on CNBC on July 5, 2015.
The 2015 ASN Formula One Driver Standings [after the We’re-Not-German Grand Prix]
1] Sebastian Vettel – 15 points
2] Lewis Hamilton – eight points
3] Nico Rosberg – six points
4] Valtteri Bottas – five points
5] Kimi Raikkonen – four points
6] Jenson Button/Nico Hulkenberg/Daniil Kvyat/Max Verstappen – two points
10] Romain Grosjean – one point
The 2015 Pastor Maldonado Driving School Award Standings [after the We’re-Not-German Grand Prix]
1] Grosjean/Maldonado – two points
2] Marcus Ericsson/Hamilton’s pit crew/Raikkonen/Raikkonen’s pit crew/ – one point
The 2015 Kimi Raikkonen Leave Me Alone I Know What I’m Doing Award Standings [after the We’re-Not-German Grand Prix]
1] Hamilton – four points
2] Rosberg – two points
3] Daniel Ricciardo pit crew/Will Stevens – one point
The 2015 Lewis Hamilton Doofus Moment Award [after the We’re-Not-German Grand Prix]
1] Hamilton – three points
2] Bernie Ecclestone – two points
3] Fernando Alonso/Christian Horner/Vettel – one point